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Writer's pictureKetan Pandit

The Art of Giving Feedback: Why Most of Us Get It Wrong


After spending nearly two decades in marketing leadership roles, I've witnessed countless feedback sessions go sideways. Despite our best intentions, feedback often leaves team members feeling dejected, hurt and often angry, rather than motivated.


And I am not here to tell giving feedback is easy. Infact, it is one of the most difficult tasks, if done properly.


Criticism is easy. Feedback is not.

Here's what I've learned about making feedback truly constructive.


What are we doing wrong while giving feedback?


In today's "I needed this yesterday" business environment, feedback has become transactional rather than transformational. We've grown accustomed to quick, drive-by comments or annual performance reviews that feel more like checkboxes than meaningful conversations. I've seen individual morale crumble derail and team dynamics derail because feedback was treated as a formality rather than an opportunity for growth.


The worst part? Many leaders believe they're excellent at giving feedback simply because they're direct or "tell it like it is." But there's a vast difference between being blunt and being effective. I've watched talented marketers leave organizations not because they couldn't handle the truth, but because they couldn't handle how that truth was delivered.


Focus on the Problem, Not the Person


Here's a scenario I encountered recently: A team mate at a company I consult with, sent out a marketing campaign that had typos in it. It did go out to a few thousand contacts. The expected reaction would be to fly off the handle and call them careless. Instead, I sat down with them and asked if there was something we could do help them not make these mistakes. Turned out they had a lot of things on their plate and hence they did not catch the typo. Shit happens, so instead of giving them an earful (the deed was done), we sat down and instituted a couple of changes in the review process.





When we focus on the problem:

  1. We create a collaborative environment where solutions become the focus

  2. We maintain professional relationships instead of creating defensive barriers

  3. We open doors for learning instead of shutting them with judgment


Think of it this way: If your GPS tells you "you made a wrong turn," it feels accusatory. But when it says "recalculating route," it feels helpful. Be the helpful GPS.


Effective Feedback Trifecta: Timely, Empathetic, and Honest


Feedback is like fresh fruit – it has an expiry date. Waiting weeks to address an issue is like serving overripe bananas; nobody wants that. But timing alone isn't enough. Your feedback needs three crucial elements:


1. Timeliness: Address issues while they're relevant and actionable

2. Empathy: Understand the other person's perspective and circumstances

3. Honesty: Deliver the truth without sugar coating, but with respect





I once delayed giving feedback to a social media manager about their inconsistent posting schedule. By the time I addressed it, three months of sporadic posting had already damaged our engagement rates. Had I addressed it immediately with empathy ("I notice you're juggling multiple priorities") and honesty ("our engagement metrics are dropping"), we could have solved the problem sooner.



4 Steps to Giving Better Feedback


After hundreds of hours of feedback conversations, here are the non-negotiables I've discovered:


  1. Set the Context

    1. Explain why this feedback matters

    2. Connect it to broader goals or objectives

    3. Choose the right setting and timing


  2. Use the Data-Impact-Action Framework

    1.  Present objective data or observations

    2.  Explain the impact on business/team/results

    3.  Suggest specific actions for improvement. Don't be vague.


  3. Create a Two-Way Dialogue

    1. Ask questions to understand their perspective

    2. Listen actively to their responses

    3. Collaborate on solutions

    4. Note down key points from the feedback discussion. Memory is an unreliable source.


  4. Follow Up

    1. Schedule check-ins to monitor progress

    2. Offer support and resources

    3. Acknowledge improvements



When to Hold Back: The Art of Not Giving Feedback


Sometimes, the best feedback is no feedback at all. Here's when you should pause:


1. When Emotions Are High

  • Never give feedback when angry or frustrated

  • Wait until both parties are calm and receptive

  • Choose a neutral time and place


2. Without Complete Information

  • Don't act on hearsay or incomplete data

  • Verify facts before providing feedback

  • Ensure you understand the full context


3. If It's Not Actionable

  • Avoid giving feedback about things people cannot change

  • Focus on behaviours and outcomes that can be improved

  • Make sure your feedback serves a purpose


4. In Public Settings

  • Praise in public. Admonish in private. Never provide any type of criticism in front of others

  • Save sensitive discussions for private conversations

  • Protect dignity and maintain trust


The Bottom Line


Effective feedback isn't about being nice or mean – it's about being clear, constructive, and committed to growth. As marketing leaders, our feedback can either build or break teams, inspire or inhibit creativity, and drive or diminish results.


Remember: The goal of feedback isn't to prove you're right; it's to help others improve and succeed. When we approach feedback with this mindset, we transform it from a dreaded conversation into a powerful tool for growth and innovation.


The next time you're about to give feedback, ask yourself: "Am I focusing on the problem or the person? Am I being timely, empathetic, and honest? Is this the right time and place?" Your answers to these questions will determine whether your feedback helps or hinders.


Further Reading / Watching

This video from TED Talks is actually a very good primer on giving and receiving feedback.



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